Cultured like yogurt*

or: An excerpt from a conversation at a party on Friday night:
(The names have been cleverly changed.)

Jerry: Some guys at work call me gay because I'm cultured.
Me: What? That's stupid. What do you mean cultured?
Jerry: I like opera, and stuff like that.
Me: Oh, what operas have you seen?
Paige: Have you been to the Sydney Opera House?
Jerry: No.
Paige: I have.
Jerry: Have you been to the Metropolitan Opera?
Paige: No.
Jerry: I have.
Me: (To Paige) Did you see an Opera in Sydney?
Paige: No.
Me: (To Jerry)  Did you see an Opera at the Met?
Jerry: No.
Me: Then you both need to shut up. (To Jerry) Have you been to any operas?
Jerry: No.

So much fun was had. 

And Jerry, if you're reading this, I was this close to having your character be called "Mack Daddy." But, since I stand behind the fact that you cannot give yourself a nickname, I'll stick with Jerry [insert famous Jerrys' last name here].

*Why yes I did say that terrible pun to Jerry right after he said he hadn't been to any operas.