Thursday, March 17, 2011

The Luck of the Irish.

A few weeks ago when I was doing some weeding, I found a four-leaf clover. I had the intent of pressing it in a book, but then I misplaced it. I found it again yesterday, shriveled and dry. Knowing that a four-leaf clover is considered lucky, I'm wondering that since I didn't take proper care of said clover, I am wondering if it is still lucky?

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Glee Recap: Original Song

Tonight I went to the Blazer game instead of being able to watch Glee with my buddies. The game was awesome, but I feel a need to express my thoughts about this episode, and since it's after midnight on a school night and calls probably wouldn't be appreciated, I'm takin' it to the blog. NYMag style.  (Fact: These past few seasons of not watching Gossip Girl have made reading the recap useless, and that makes me sad. But not sad enough to hop back on that train. I don't care how well dressed Blair is and how many Birkins Lily has.)

Just as fabulous as Brittany's floppy hat.
  • Songs from Mercedes & Santana!! I have been eagerly awaiting this, and even though they were original and super silly, I loved hearing their awesome voices solo once again. +5
  • Speaking of, a song called "Trouty Mouth" that opens with the line "Guppy face," Oh Santana, you crack me up. +2
  • And Mercedes rhymed Wheaties with diabetes. GENIUS! +10
  • Puck's song was pretty delightful as well. I especially liked the "you won't make it past age 40" part. +3
  • "Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Fake Boobs." followed by the soiled Brittany saying, "I don't remember putting that in there." Brittany is my absolute favorite. And her favorite song is "My Headband." Way to bring that full circle, writers! +7
  • Kurt singing one of the best Beatles songs ever was a major highlight, but the fact that he was actually singing Blackbird about a's a wash.
  • Sue Silvester was more quietly outrageous than she has been in a while. Throwing sticks at Mercedes and then punching the Lieutenant Governor's wife totally deserve points. +10
  • Speaking of the Lieutenant Governor's wife, "My husband is verbally abusive and I have been drinking since noon." Glee, you're so good with the one-liners. +5
  • Oral Intensity's name. +50
  • Oral Intensity's human formation of the Star of David after their Jesus song!! +10
  • I really liked that a stripper who needed a place to live became a nun. +3
  • Kurt's bedazzled bird casket was delightful, as was his saying that his mom's casket was bigger. Plus the Hamlet reference. +8

Worse than trying to make Quinn's boots happen.
  • Awkwardness between Brittana or Santany(?) - writers, why mess with a good thing? These girls have the greatest comedic chemistry on your show, and now, what? -20
  • Quinn being all insecure and desperate, planning prom 2 months ahead of time so she won't lose Finn? While it may be accurate to the character of a teenage girl, it's obnoxious. -3
  • Blain has the worst song choices! He so would choose than awful Pink song (I know I should be more specific when it comes to awful Pink songs.) But what was that duet that Kurt and Blain did? Snoozefest! -10
  • Wardrobe people - cease and desist with those leggings under the performance dresses. I suppose it made a little sense the last time when Brittany was twirling and flipping everywhere, but no such maneuvers were happening this time, and yet all of those girls were wearing those hideous things. You're so good in EVERY other instance. Please, just stop. -15
  • Kathy Griffin, I don't want to be mean, but what is happening to your face? You were looking really good after your first round of plastic surgeries, and now, eek. -2
  • Directors & Camera operators: STOP CIRCLING. There are other shots. I promise. You folks use it like its going out of style. But it already has. -25
  • There are some things I am willing to suspend my disbelief on, but the multiple foam fingers that Kurt just happened to find in the auditorium. No. Just no! -15
  • Speaking of suspending disbelief, I realize you want things to be dramatic, but every time, you decide the day of, or the day before competition what songs you will sing. This is not how real choirs work. -5
  • Mr. Shue is totally that geek who would be all cheesy and giddy on the phone to his new girlfriend, I'll give you that. But why do you have to make up excuses that she's not there. She's a sub, she doesn't have to be at a meditation retreat to not be there. She could just be at another school. Namaste, but -10
  • Are you trying to drop hints that Kurt is going to transfer back to WMHS? Drama drama drama. -3
  • And in the preview for future shows, Terry is back and she doesn't look preggers. This kind of ruins our forecasting of things to come. I won't take any points off, but it does concern me. 

Overall, a fairly enjoyable episode, but I hope they don't get too comfortable with these original songs. The last thing we need is Tina singing a song about vampires and then breaking into tears.

Monday, March 7, 2011

The Danes v. The Dutch

I was instructed by some friends yesterday to include more stories about people on my blog. As in, more of my anecdotes about running in to silly people, or having embarrassing interactions with people.

In pondering that, I was thinking...what should I share? It probably shouldn't be with people's real names, because that seems to get me into trouble - see Hawkeye Rachel and AD Trivia Night with lame Kyle. And, it also shouldn't be too obviously about someone with whom I am acquainted, who could potentially stumble upon it, so I'll try to shelter the guilty (or rather, mocked) unless they REALLY deserve it. (I'm talking to you, Kyle.)

I narrowed down my potential story for you to two, both relating to my new job as a sub, one in which I was a COMPLETE and TOTAL moron, and one in which everyone else in the room was. Which do you think I'm going to share??

I was sitting in a high school level classroom with two other instructors and about a dozen kids, when one of the other instructors asked what language people speak in Denmark. One of the students said, "Dutch." And so I had to hop in and say, "Actually, in Denmark, the people speak Danish." The student and the third instructor said, no it was Dutch. I'm REALLY trying not to be such a know-it-all-jerk-wad, but it was a situation where these people were just wrong, about a fact, that could be easily researched. So I suggested they look it up on Google. I said that people in The Netherlands spoke Dutch, along with French and German.  Another student said that he thought the Dutch lived in Holland, and I said, "well, Holland is in The Netherlands. Holland isn't a country." After a little Googling it was proved that Danes speak Danish and Dutch speak Dutch. Shocker. Then, the first instructor asked me where The Netherlands was, she couldn't find it on the map. Sure enough, it was right where Europe had left it. That's right, you read correctly, that this was a high school class.

OK, fine, I'll tell you about how I am an idiot too, lest you think I don't know that I am. Last night I got a call to sub for someone. I listened to the times, the school, the job and name of the person, but when I showed up to that school this morning, it was pointed out to me that I failed to listen to the date of the assignment. I'll head back to that school this Thursday.