This morning I was headed over the Fremont Bridge, the tallest bridge here in Bridgetown when some Chachi wasn't paying attention and tried to change lanes into me. A little evasive maneuvering and everything was fine - crisis averted, but this is not the potential death I mean to talk about.
Reem is in town for Becky's wedding, which is of course delightful. This afternoon Reem and I met at Shara's office and the three of us stood in the parking lot chatting for a while about fraud, skinny jeans, and bees as we are wont to do. At one point someone who shall remain nameless* decided to start tapping me in a way that...how shall I put this...was not pleasant nor something I feel like anyone would or should tolerate,** so I started to back away. I kept retreating whilst unfortunately not looking where I was going, until I ran in to a small boulder. I was very close to falling backward over said boulder and into a second small boulder which would have caused at least a concussion. It was only through the use of my very uncatlike reflexes that I clumsily avoided a head injury. So, now having been through the trauma of almost falling onto a rock, I would like to speak out for all of the girls who have had their boobs continuously tapped by their very good friends. You don't have to take it, but by all means, look where you are going.
** It actually prompted a conversation about a certain New Girl scene afterward.